Babies Come From Where?

This week I did a prenatal massage and the mommy-to-be was happy to chat about her current pregnancy,   as well as her one other previous pregnancy and delivery.  I shared some details of my own pregnancies as well.  After the massage was completed I thought back to the day that my boys asked about where babies came from.  Of course it was only natural that this conversation took place at the dinner table....I mean don't most people talk about this stuff when they are eating?

The conversation was started by my 8 year old son with my 5 year old chiming in from time to time.  The mother of one of their friends was expecting and the boys had been discussing this oddity in length.  Teebie (really Stevie but he could not pronounce words that started with "S" so he was forever known as Teebie) had told my oldest son that when it was time for the baby to be born, it would come out of his mother's "butt".  Now my son was not buying that so he decided to ask me about it at dinner that night.

Son 1:  "Babies don't really come out of their mommy's butts do they?  They are in their mommy's stomach so I think there must be a way they come out there, right?"

Me:   "Ummm, well not exactly.  It is more like the babies come out of where mommies pee pee from.  But sometimes babies do come out of the tummy by a c-section.  This is when a doctor cuts open the mommy's belly and gets the baby out, then he sews the mommy back up."

Both boys are staring at me with wrinkled brows and puzzled expressions.

Son 1:  "How do those babies get in their mommy's belly anyway?"

Me:  "Ummm, well......(Thank you Rob Roy) They get out by the same road they get in.  They are put there with love."   ~HOLDS BREATH AND HOPES THAT MY ANSWER IS ACCEPTED WITHOUT ANYMORE QUESTIONS~ But no....

Son 1:  "But how do they get out?"

As luck would have it we were eating hot dogs for supper. Get your minds out of the gutter!  I picked up a saucer and the top to the ketchup bottle as I knew this discussion was going to need props for the full effect.

Me:  (holding up the top for the ketchup) "You see this?  The hole that babies come out of is this big most of the time.  (holding up the saucer)  You see this?  The hole has to stretch to this size so the baby can get out."

Son 2:  (with enormous eyes)  "THANK GOD WE'RE MEN!"

Yep, he got it!