Stretching Between Massage Appointments

If you are not quite sure if you are doing the stretch correctly, please call the office and let us walk you through it so it will less likely involve injuries and most likely decrease pain.

Heard This Week on the Massage Table

 Me:   Did I forget to take you off the schedule this week?
Client:   No did I f u?  Thought it was for tomorrow.
Client:   F*ck it is Wednesday!  I am a dumb-ass, sorry

Client:  Have you heard of Fun Parties?
Me:  Yes
Client:  I went to one last week and the first item they showed us was ball waxing cream, who knew there was such a thing!?


Client:  I think your new room is tastefully decorated and you made a good move trading rooms.
Me:   I like everything about it except for noise.
(As if on cue, bouncing balls started up at the group fitness room next door)
Me:  Well shit.


Client:  How are your chickens?
Me:  Well about 3 am I got up to potty and heard a ruckus--which usually means raccoons are trying to kill one of them.  So not thinking, I ran out the backdoor and into the chicken yard to save them.  I chased off the raccoons and put all the girls back in their coop.  As I was walking back into the house I noticed that I had been chicken herding in nothing but a tee shirt.  I sure hope my neighbors don't have night vision goggles because I am pretty sure that seeing my bare ass would probably have scarred them for life.


Client:  How's business?
Me:  Really good!  My only complaint is I have some clients that want all my Saturdays.  I mean don't get me wrong, I love being busy.....but come basketball season I will not be here when there is a Saturday game.  Priorities, ya know?


Me:  Did you see the news last week, the meth house?  It was about 5 houses down the street from me.
Client:  Oh my god!  We had one in our neighborhood earlier this year too!
Me:  Woohoo!  Not many people can boast about that like we can!