Someone Died Here

This weekend Hubby and I headed out to the World Chicken Festival (which was not very worldly by the way) and along the roadway we saw several crosses marking sites of a loved one's fatality car accident. You know the ones I mean.... hand-painted "RIP", yellow ribbons, tacky plastic flowers,etc.  The technical term is "roadside memorial" and this trend is creating  controversy around the world.  My question is simply "Why do we feel the need to put our grief on a seemingly permanent display?".

People die all the time and yet we do not feel the need to mark the spot where they drew their last breath--unless it happens on a major highway.  When did we decide MVA fatalities need to be marked like an address on Google Maps? Does driving by the scene where the accident occurred and seeing a tribute to the dead make this loss somewhat more profound?  Does it serve as a warning for other drivers?  Were all these dead drivers' families too poor to afford a plot in the local cemetery?  Did the family members hope their markers would become important historical sites 100 years from now?  I. Just. Don't. Get. It.

Some folks will say I am insensitive.  Perhaps some will think I do not understand grief.  And let's face it, I worked in a 911 Center for years so I have become desensitized to some degree, but this trend of planting death markers along the highway is just plain disturbing to me.  Allow me to explain why these memorials bother me so much.  Ya know what I think of when I see these markers?  Pets being buried in the backyard; their graves marked with a decorative rock.  That is what I think about when I see these gruesome markers.  Which leads me to another thought..... I wonder if any of the death markers are for family pets.  It is quite plausible that Fido could wander out into a busy street and get a quick ticket to Doggie Heaven.  Instead of a nice quiet backyard memorial, Fido will be forever tied to an ugly marker on the busy highway that ultimately aided in his demise.

So where do we draw the line on what is or is not an acceptable place for the death markers?

Clearly hospitals are out due the to sheer volume of sick and injured people that seek treatment.  Picture yourself being wheeled into the ER and noticing a wreath on the nurse's station that has a big ass number that depicts how many people died here.  Not very reassuring, eh?  Ignorance is bliss in this instance.


What about drowning victims?  Will the new fad be to anchor buoys over the accident site?  "RIP Billy Ray.  Good Man, Weren't so Good Swimmer"


Nursing homes......do I really need to elaborate on this one?  Instead of death markers they would need a "Now Serving" sign like Baskin Robbins.

Suicide victims?  Are memorials off the table for those who take their own lives?  What happens if they commit suicide by wrecking their car?  Do they get the death marker then?

While I am making light of this, I truly understand the tremendous loss one feels when their loved one passes.  I mourn and grieve my losses too, but for me, it is a private matter.....with a lovely headstone in a cemetery--you know, the place where death memorials are not only welcomed, but encouraged.