Thursday, January 3, 2013

Heard This Week on the Massage Table

Client:  I used to see a Russian lady in Nashville and she was small like you, but she had a strong grip....I think you have her beat.


Client:  That could not have been an hour! 
Me:  It's the fastest hour of your life, huh?
Client:  I think you had one hand on my back and the other hand was changing the clock.


Text Message:  Hey when is your next opening?  I am getting my new boobs next week!


Client:  Christ what is that?
Me:  Been shoveling snow today?
Client:  Yes I have.
Me:  There's your answer.


Client:  If you were a man I would ask you to marry me.


Me:  Yeah, I apologized for my full-blown bitch mode today.
Client:  Just today?

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